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Honest Descriptions of Quest Facilities

An obvious, but a fresh look of our space and Questies

My dear reader, sometimes I think we forget the true purpose of the facilities at Quest. While we may not have many, may I suggest to you to look at these places from a different perspective? You may believe that at this point of the year, you know everything, but oh how wrong you may be! Let me remove the facade in front of your eyes and tell you the naked truth about where we live, study, and cry.

Academic Building

This is the place where you will give a shit for  most of the time. Sometimes you will not only give a shit, but you will also give an arm, a leg and a bit of emotional stability for a grade from tutors who see grading as a poor indication of your skills. It’s okay though, I think that  your sleepless nights in the breakout rooms also deserve an A.

This is the place where natural science classes will show you how cool the world is while social sciences will show you how shitty it is. From mathematics you will learn how to see the world in numbers, only for social science classes to argue that not everything is quantifiable. On rare occasions, when you will get to have an actual art class, exploring your true creative potential, only for social sciences to tell you that “art is political”, thus affiliating your artwork with a political stance.

Atrium

The atrium serves as a public space filled with students like you and me however it reaches full potential only at 12:00 through 1:00 PM.  This is also a perfect place for passive-aggressive posters, banners and illustrations to increase awareness of things that everyone is aware of. In addition, you can find a bunch of offices here, with people who will know your finances, grades, mails, places of birth, where you live, and perhaps even your your internet history (naughty, tisk tisk!). They closely resemble a government (so much that you might wonder might if they could be watching you through your laptop’s camera).

It also has the only legal Quest shop, where you can buy overpriced books which you can mostly find free online. If you are like me and your morals get the better of you (or you just don’t want to admit that you can’t find one), you will never forget this delightful experience of buying 4 books for 100$ or more.

Library

Perhaps the most chill and quiet place at Quest. This is where you find books. Wow. Libraries are such a fun place to be. But oh wait, it doesn’t have many books! Have no fear there is an online library. But oh wait, you can’t open your article/book for free for your last-minute midnight essay that is due in the morning. Have no fear, you ask librarians to buy it for you and it will come in a week. As for your essay, you will have to rely on authentic and compelling Buzzfeed sources to get your point across.

Cafeteria

This place is a fucking battlefield on weekday afternoons. With the amount of people there at that time, you might wonder if the cooks must put something in there that draws so many of us to them…

Whilst people are waiting for food, you occasionally might observe a touching interaction of 3rd and 4th years establishing connections with the 1st years.  For some it might look like they are begging for food-based patronage, but I will argue that it is purely done to bond community together. I mean, I wouldn’t have such ulterior motives…

Not at all.

However, I would never deny free food.

Multi-Purpose Room (MPR)

This is an amazing place full of wonderful performances including; white people telling you about checking your white privileges; talks of very specific subjects that will only matter to 10-12 people on campus; overfilled drag-shows that violates the fire code; NAKED show, with no actual nudity, and bunch of Quest students trying to prove that by skiing they will answer their question about environment sustainability.

As suggested by the room’s name there are various events that only around 15% of campus knows about.

There is also a team of students who call themselves “special events crew” who set up these events. I heard that there is this amazing dude, who like – does all the work – all by himself while others don’t work. I think his name starts with a K? Something like Merill? Derill? Anyway, he truly deserves to be paid triple for his time, so please convince his boss to raise his salary. Thanks.

As you may now see my dear reader, Quest has a lot of wonderful facilities that push you to become a better human-being. I hope that after seeing these new perspectives, you will be able to have a fresh look at our lonely university in the mountains.

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Valerie Fowles

In addition to working with the Mark this year, Val is an employee of the SRC as the communications officer and a co-organizer of the Our_Futures academic colloquia. If you talk to her in person beware her horrible puns and her strong opinions on corn.

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